“Bill, you have to go online more.” “Bill, you need to search for more cigar stories.” “Bill, you have to learn how to use Social Media, Tweet more often, comment on videos.”
Stop it already! I hate that stupid box. It’s worse than the damn TV. I used to call television the “idiot box” but looking at some of the stuff on the internet, it’s like sitting through a Niels Bohr lecture in comparison. It would be just fine with me if it broke, if that’s even possible. The kids with the phones are completely out of control, for adults too. There’s no way to keep going here and not have everyone mad at me so I’ll just stop before it gets out of hand.
I will issue this one warning, if I get into a car accident and if it was caused by someone using their phone I’m going to take that phone and cram it [down their throat].
So my challenge the past few weeks has been to go on the internet more often and find a few things I like, besides our websites. What a steaming pile of [expletive deleted] that internet is. I started on Twitter where I have an account [@stogiereport] since I’m supposed to be posting there anyway. Holy Crap! Have you ever clicked on those words with the pound sign in front of them? It’s unbelievable. I clicked on pound sign Trump because I thought it might be some message from the President, what a mistake. I felt like I needed a rabies shot after that.
Then I remembered I also have an account on Cigargrams. It’s like Twitter but only about cigars. Much, much better. I love that website. The only problem is there are not very many people using it yet, so I only got to read about twelve posts. Half of those were telling me to use cigar grams. I think the guy who runs it, I don’t know his name [@cigarmaster], is trying to build up the number of people who go there. That would be great. Might just start using that instead of Twitter. Go on there and click on my picture and hit some button then I’ll be able to read what you write. If you’re writing to me, just use regular sentences, don’t put pound signs in the words or send me smile faces, I don’t want to puke.
One very nice thing I found on the Cigargrams website is Cigar Informer. I had seen them before but never really looked into it. What a great resource! If you’ve never seen it, they go all over the place and search for great deals on smokes, then tip you off. They have ‘Deal Alerts’ which I skipped over at first because I thought they were ads, but let me tell you, don’t skip these. I don’t know how they find this stuff but what they find is amazing. Their website also has reviews and things which are just as good. Amazing! They must be in on a lot of insider information, I rarely see deals like they find anywhere else.
Since I’m on the subject I’ll add one more website that I found. It’s new and it’s another guy doing reviews. In this case it’s for both cigars and pipe tobacco. It’s called “Voodoo Review; Premium Tobacco Reviews” and it’s written by a guy named Donald. Donald has come up with a great way to do reviews. He does a complete review including a little history and drink parings but he releases it in pieces. Short enough to be able to read when you have a couple of minutes but when finished you get an in depth review. It appeals to those that want it short and sweet and also to those that want more. It’s also smart because later on when you search, it will be easier to find what you want. So if I’m looking for cigars that go good with Bourbon those post should come right to the top. He does both pipe tobacco and cigars so there’s sure to be something in there for everyone.
That’s pretty much it. I didn’t see anything else I liked but I couldn’t take it anymore so I didn’t look for much longer. I stayed off that stupid thing for a few days and it was like heaven. When I see people walking around with their noses glued to that thing in their hand, it’s no wonder the world has gotten to the point it is in now. There’s no reason to be on the internet in a day any longer than it takes to smoke a pipe or a Robusto.
Bill is the Managing Editor of www.stogiereport.com
He can be reached at email@example.com
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